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Be careful what you wish for if you want closure on the season finale of “True Blood.” All is not well that ends bloody, and otherwise we’re left with more cliffhangers than a daily soap opera.
It’s Halloween in Bon Temp, so it’s trick or treat time for fans. Among the treats are male bondage (top photo) and a few classic “True Blood” thrill kills. But heartbreak, unwanted returns and resurrections and shocking ends for some are among the underhanded All Hallow’s Eve tricks. For a season that started with too many characters, the finale picks off many of the stragglers and a even few faves.
When we left Lafayette last week, we knew that being possessed by the spirit of Marnie spelled trouble, even if we were a bit peeved that Lafayette would stereotypically play yet another woman (second photo). What? Flamboyant gay mediums don’t get inhabited by men?
Drama ensues on cue, but no one expects loyal boyfriend Jesus to pay the price. Marnie – in Lafayette’s body– wants Jesus’ magic, he wants her not to hurt Lafayette, and we want her to just die already. Just when we think Jesus’ incantations to hand over his powers will at least ameliorate the moment, Lafayette-cum-Marnie unceremoniously plunges a knife into Jesus.
Our boy is dead. There goes our chance for some gay nookie this season. Nelsan Ellis, who plays Lafayette, warned us that “fans are gonna be upset.” Nah! Ya think?
But that may not be the end of the gays. In one cliffhanger that piques our anticipation, there’s a hole in the concrete slab that encased evil King Russell Edgington last season. You know his return spells wickedly engaging trouble for Bill and Eric, but right now, they’re busy making short work of Nan Flanagan. Before she’s floor goo, Nan portends that the entire Vampire Authority are out to end the head vamps in charge of Bon Temps.
Meanwhile, Sookie and Tara dream of being old ladies together, and if that isn’t some foreshadowing, you haven’t been watching “True Blood” long enough. Sookie’s been sensing her dead Gran’s presence all day. After all, Halloween is the day that the veil between life and death is at its thinnest. For the townies, it’s dress-up day, and for the witches, it’s payback time.
Lafayette as Marnie as empowered by Jesus (third photo) gets a moo-moo and gets to work. Soon enough, Eric and Bill are in a homoerotic pickle chained over a bonfire just as Sookie, Tara and Holly arrive to try and save them. Sookie holds off trouble with a faerie-lightning bolt so they can summon the dead –including good ol’ Gran – to put out the fire, free Lafayette of his possession and take Marnie away for good.
But all the cuts aren’t clean in a finale that leaves us guessing. Debbie Pelt is bent on V-fueled revenge and aims a shotgun at Sookie. She shoots, but it’s Tara who takes a bullet. Sookie wrestles away the gun and blasts Debbie’s face off, but in the biggest shocker of them all, Tara is one dead lesbian (bottom photo). Or at least we think so. Even Rutina Wesley, who plays Tara, says she doesn’t see how she can come back with half her head blown off, but she adds, “anything can happen.” Ain’t it the truth?
In other leave-us-hanging moments, Sookie dumps both Bill and Eric, the cute guy from “Felicity” comes out of nowhere calling for Terry, the ghost of Arlene’s serial killer ex visits with a warning, Alcide wants Sookie, Pam hates Sookie, Jason and Jessica agree to be fuck buddies after Hoyt kicks Jason’s ass, and a thoroughly distraught Lafayette shares a final kiss with Jesus’ ghost.
Is Tara really dead? Who’ll come help Sookie? Is Russell coming back? Can Lafayette and Jesus still hang out? We have seven months to wait and find out.
