The bizarre opening sequence mixing scenes from “Clash of the Titans” with the “American Idol” Top 10 was one of the most awkward product placements ever, especially since this season is devoid of titans.
Season 2 winner Ruben Studdard resurfaced to promote another album no one will buy and give current contestant Michael Lynche a glimpse of his future singing tepid R&B songs. Props, though, for taking fellow has-been and Season 2 runner-up, Clay Gayken…errr…Aiken, on tour with him this summer.
Justin “Baby Dyke” Bieber was in the audience to watch Usher perform his new single “OMG.” Usher sounded terrible, and the weak-ass Fosse dance moves were totally uninspired. The triple screen camera angles were pointless as was goat-bleating guest vocalist Will.I.Am.
Then Diddy turned up doing a mix of his tired old dance moves with some cribbing from Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” in a song that sounded like a reject from Kanye’s last album. A warning flashed across the screen saying Diddy’s number would feature strobe flashes, but a seizure would have been a welcome distraction.
Didi Benami and Tim Urban (top two photos) were, predictably, in the bottom two. Katie Stevens (third photo) was the other singer in the bottom three, but she was sent immediately to safety.
In the end, Teflon Tim earned another reprieve, which meant Didi had to sing for the judge’s save. She decided to re-butcher Fleetwood Mac’s “Rhiannon,” to no avail. She was, at last, sent home.
Next week, the Top 9 will surely butcher the songs of The Beatles. This didn’t work last season, but I guess Paul McCartney still has some alimony to pay.
Collin Kelley is a poet, Atlanta-based journalist and author of the recently released novel, “Conquering Venus.” Follow him on the Modern Confessional blog at collinkelley.com.