Need Wood? A whole new Daddy Complex

Add this share
READ MORE | Catch up on all the Need Wood? columns on Project Q Atlanta

Having sex in your parents’ house gets you going, but the boyfriend? Not so much. Freeing his inhibitions might be easier with a few tips on how not to get caught in the parent trap.

Hey Mike!
imageMy boyfriend and I are planning a trip to spend time with our parents. It sounds pretty normal, but the thing of it is that as soon as we get into bed, I want to jump him like an animal.

I don’t know if it’s the sneaking around or the “I’m so bad” part of doing it at our parents’ houses, but it has been the best sex we’ve ever had.

My boyfriend’s not as into it as I am. I’ve actually had to force him to do it a couple times, but once he gets into it, it’s amazing.

How can I get him past his inhibitions so we can get down to business?
–Daddy Complex

Dear Daddy Complex:
If you want him to drop his drawers, you have to raise some issues. Like how not to get caught. Talk to him about soundproofing the guest bedroom. Here are a few tips to keep the nosiest of parents at bay:

Use a towel to “weather-strip” the bottom of the door

Bring a portable CD player and place it right behind the door. If the bed squeaks a lot, play Britney. If he moans a lot, play Barry White.

Put a chair under the doorknob if they don’t have a lock.

Run the shower. If they have especially thin walls, they’ll hear the water running in the pipes instead of you laying pipe.

Of course, I’d also consider the time-tested, zipper-opening strategy called liquor. It wipes away inhibitions like a washcloth. One or two beers, and you’ll be under his belt in no time. Be cautious, though. Alcohol can lower inhibitions, but it can also lower performance.

The point is to address his concerns. You take care of his worry, and he’ll take care of your little fetish. Once he realizes you’ve practically eliminated the chance of parental humiliation, the only time you’re going to hear him say, “Don’t” is right before he says, “…stop.”

imageContributing blogger Mike Alvear is an Atlanta-based columnist, author and TV personality. Dating life in the dirt? Download his ebooks, “Attract Hotter Guys with the Secrets & Science of Sexual Body Language,” and “Attract Hotter Guys Online: The Secrets To Making Yourself Irresistible on Gay Dating Sites.” Have a question for Need Wood? Just {encode=”[email protected]” title=”send it in”}.


10 people you never, ever want to date again

You know them. Maybe you loved them. Just say no to the these 10 LGBTQ people who we never, ever want to date again.   Bitter &...

The best LGBTQ things to do in Atlanta this weekend

Shows, sports and other queer shenanigans top a busy list of Atlanta events for LGBTQ and allied weekenders. Keep scrolling and click on each event...

Gender nonconforming person beaten, puppy stolen in Midtown

An armed robber pistol-whipped a 53-year-old gender nonconforming person in his Midtown home last month then stole the victim's puppy. The suspect is still...

Q ATLus catches Atlanta dreaming of Pride Weekend

Every last one of us will probably take a different route to celebrating Pride 2021, and that’s OK. With love in their hearts and safety...

Atlanta at center of jump in anti-LGBTQ hate crimes

Two-thirds of the 28 anti-LGBTQ hate crimes reported in Georgia by the FBI in 2020 occurred in metro Atlanta. The number of overall hate crimes...