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So you love sex and do something about it every chance you get. Does that make you a sex addict? Frequent encounters aren’t the measuring stick. Here’s how to tell if you’re having sex or if sex is having you.
Hey Mike!
I love sex. Sometimes have it two or three times a day, whether its masturbating or going to sex clubs, baths and bars.
Yes, I’m a skanky whore. I admit it.
Well, I don’t know about the skanky part, but I do like dick and want it as often as possible.
My question, and I do have one: What’s the difference between having a really high sex drive–and doing something about it–and being a sex addict?
–Trampolina
Dear Trampolina:
Whores and sex addicts may share the same “drug” (dick), but they have completely different experiences with it. Addicts suffer negative consequences from their behavior. Whores don’t. Well, except for the occasional penicillin shot.
Whores stop when sex creates problems in other areas of their lives. Addicts don’t. Tramps can stop if they choose. Addicts can’t. Mansluts don’t get into financial trouble or have problems at work for chasing after dick. Sex addicts do.
Some people think if they have “x” number of tricks or masturbate “x” number of times, they cross the threshold from having a high sex drive to being a helpless sex addict. Sex addiction Guru Patrick Carnes (great book—“Out of the Shadows”) addressed the idea of equating sex addiction to an arbitrary number in an interview with Esquire a while back.
“That’s like asking how many drinks make an alcoholic,” he said.
The difference isn’t in the number but in the consequences. Whores can have a trick every other night without endangering their jobs, relationships, or financial stability. Sex addicts can have half the tricks and double the trouble. Again, the difference isn’t the amount of dick you’re having but the amount of trouble it’s causing.
After reading this, if you think you have a problem, there are gay-led mental health agencies, support groups and private therapists who can help. But if you’re just a whore, call me.
Contributing blogger Mike Alvear is an Atlanta-based columnist, author and TV personality. Dating life in the dirt? Download his ebooks, “Attract Hotter Guys with the Secrets & Science of Sexual Body Language,” and “Attract Hotter Guys Online: The Secrets To Making Yourself Irresistible on Gay Dating Sites.” Have a question for Need Wood? Just {encode=”[email protected]” title=”send it in”}.
