Finally! After a slow start, the long-awaited full moon spells trouble, sex and a fair share of crazy for vampires, shapeshifters and humans alike, but it also spells the “True Blood” we know and love.
They made us wait long enough, and we’re halfway through the season now, so let’s just start at the end this week, which is what everyone at the water cooler is talking about anyway.
After more than three seasons of sexual tension and passive-aggressive denial, Sookie can’t help it any longer and finally dances with the devil in the pale moonlight and does Eric in the woods (top photo). Of course, it’s new Honest Eric, so by “True Blood” standards, the sex scene is tame, leaving oglers a little blue-balled. Come on, we always want more nekkid, not less, and more forbidden passion, not less. But at least it’s done.
And they’re far from the only ones getting some action. We just knew it was the hot girlfriend at the door when newly lesbian Tara decided to answer it in her panties. In yet another instance of “finally” this week, Tara won’t get out of town like she’s been promising, so the girlfriend comes to her to give us some gay. Cue angry-love you-makeup sex (second photo).
Like Sam, we can’t decide if we’re supposed to care about or hate Tommy. Well, we know we hate him, just not if we’re supposed to. The show makes it a little clearer this week that he’s bad to the boner. Seems that killing family members lets shapeshifters shift into people, so Tommy changes into Sam, fires Sookie, acts like an asshole, then beds an unsuspecting Luna, so even he’s getting some full-moon lovin’. The whole ordeal makes Tommy—and us—want to throw up.
Speaking of entering people, Marnie’s witchy spirit friend from the Spanish Inquisition enters her, and the vengeance on the vampires is going to be fierce. Lafayette gets entered, too – just not by Jesus, and we’re a little miffed that the gay boys (bottom photo) don’t get down to business like most everyone else on the show. A spirit comes into LaLa long enough to teach him a second language and empower the boys with some magic for later.
It’s kind of ironic that hot dumb Jason is one of the few main characters who doesn’t get any this week. After all, even he notes that among all the mystical creatures on the show, his “specialness” is how “good I am at sex and shootin’.” But he’s too busy worrying about turning into a werepanther at the full moon, which isn’t how it works, so we’re satisfied that he just takes off his shirt, handcuffs himself to the bed and covets his best friend’s girl.
Thankfully, the episode leaves most of the far-flung subplots for another day. Andy is still an addict and a dick, Terry and Arlene are still clueless and have a cute-as-a-button evil baby, Pam’s still rotting and pissed about it, and Bill is still brooding and boring. It’s almost — dare we say it? – uncomplicated. But you know things in Bon Temps never stay that way for long.