You know them. Maybe you loved them. Whether they're bitter and taking you down with them or their toxicity is contagious, and when you're done asking "Why am I still single?" and "Who are these crazies?", these are the lovers who you never want to love again.
Bitter & Jaded
They don’t even know exactly what’s wrong, but they definitely know it is. You’ll know them by the disapproving look of insecurity disguised as superiority.
They’re so into you – until something shiny catches their attention or they’re off to the bathroom for another bump of personality.
The first to remind you that they’re “not into drama,” and the first to be offended, assume the worst, or push your buttons.
GOP (Gay Old Party)
It’s OK to be financially conservative, but their politics actively work against their equality. Let them fool themselves, but don’t get dragged into it.
It’s not a contest, but they’re winning. Being a “total top” is one thing; out to prove it by shaming others is another.
This selfie-snapper and InstaCeleb shares good hair days and bad blood. They forego human interaction to obsess in the mirror and strike “subtle” poses in public.
Ex ‘Ex Gay’
Congratulate them on finally getting it together regarding their sexuality and wish them the best, but this one’s got more issues than the NationalGeographic.
Not on Grindr and doesn’t do one-night stands. Making you feel gross about hooking up is less about you and more about his hang-ups.
Strippers and Escorts
Zero judgement on doing what they have to do, but if dating is a numbers game, they’re an odds-on favorite for other options. Maybe give them a second chance after they put themselves through school.
If everyone is into it, they’re over it. Conforms to being a non-conformist. Too busy being oh-so special to notice you.
This article originally appeared in Q magazine. Read the full issue below: